Sunday, 9 August 2009

So how's the treatment going?

Well, so far there have been "no noticeable" side effects of the lamactil or whatever it's called (interesting raspberry flavour though, not nice when you've just brushed your teeth before bed) but seeing as I have been caking on the factor 50 I haven't had any sun reactive rashes (so far....).

Had a psychiatric appointment last Friday. Wasn't really in the mood for talking (plus I was tired from my boyfriend dragging me up the mountain the day before and have the prospect of working the next 8 days in a row) and had been feeling a bit tearful and depressed about how beautiful the world is around me sometimes. Wish I was in the UK living again on the islands off Cornwall, but I don't think that's going to happen or be right for me - it will just be running away again.

But I like running away.

So listening to my iPod on the way to the appointment and on the way back the songs were getting more and more towards the Radiohead end of things. My boyfriend noticed when I got home that I was not "right" and waited until the initial tiredness of sorting my brain out after my psych appointment before asking me how I was. the thing is, I am finding it more and more difficult to express how I feel and am sick of the sound of my own voice. Just want the world to go away. Anyway, J gave me a long hug and let me cry on his shoulder, then made me a cup of tea. this last bit is significant - he hates making cups of tea.

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